The ARMC
Two anxiety ridden Moms and professionals taking on life and work. We've come together to talk about it all and formed The Anxiety Ridden Moms Club or ARMC for short. Welcome to our show, we look forward at what's to come. Thank you for joining us every week for a new episode.
The ARMC
Finding Joy Again As Anxious Moms
Joy shouldn’t feel like another item on the to‑do list, yet anxiety often makes play feel wasteful, risky, or selfish. We get honest about how motherhood, comparison, and shifting relationships quietly drain our delight—and we map a practical way back with small, doable steps that don’t require a new hobby, a big budget, or anyone’s approval.
We share candid stories about losing—and then relearning—fun: the guilt that creeps in at brunch, the pressure to engineer perfect vacations after divorce, and the habit of asking “Is everyone else having a good time?” while ignoring our own. From comedy nights and kitchen dance breaks to low‑cost walks and learning projects, we show how joy can be reclaimed in ten minutes at a time. We also talk seasons of friendship, building a village without forcing it, and choosing dates with your partner even when everyone else is busy. Aging bodies and anxious minds make certain thrills tougher, so we pivot to movement and play that energize rather than deplete.
If anxiety is the voice that says you don’t have time for fun, joy is the voice that says you don’t have time not to. Your challenge: pick one small thing this week that is only for you—no guilt, no productivity attached—and protect it like an appointment. Anxious moms deserve joy too, and the path back begins with tiny, unapologetic moments of light. If this conversation hits home, follow the Anxiety Ridden Moms Club, subscribe, and leave a quick review. Share this with a mom who needs a nudge toward her own ten‑minute win, and tell us: what will you try first?
Welcome back to the Anxiety Ridden Moms Club, season two, baby. We're still anxious, still thriving, ish, and this season we're diving deep into one of the most complicated, beautiful, and straight-up messy parts of motherhood.
SPEAKER_00:Relationships. The ones that lift us up, the ones that drain us, and the ones that change when motherhood hits like a wrecking ball.
SPEAKER_01:From ride or die friendships to awkward play date moms, from supportive partners to the ones who just don't get it, we're unpacking it all.
SPEAKER_00:Because motherhood doesn't just reshape your body, it reshapes your people. And sometimes you outgrow folks.
SPEAKER_01:Sometimes you build a village you never had. We're talking about boundaries, support systems, love languages, mom guilt, and learning to unapologetically put yourself first.
SPEAKER_00:If your group chat is your therapy, if your Tyler is your toxic coworker, or if your idea of date night is hiding in the pantry with snacks, this season is for you.
SPEAKER_01:Let's talk about it, let's laugh, cry, confess, and build this messy, anxious, loving village together. Welcome to season two of the Anxiety Ridden Moms Club. Welcome back to the Anxiety Ridden Moms Club. If you're new here, hey, welcome to the club. Nobody wanted to join, but every mom needs.
SPEAKER_00:Today we're diving into something that so many of us lose along the way: our relationship with fun and joy. Remember when fun wasn't something you had to schedule or feel guilty about?
SPEAKER_01:Right? Somewhere between diaper changes, school drop-offs, and mental load Olympics, joy became something we had to earn. But what if anxiety has been tricking us into thinking we don't deserve to have fun unless everything's perfect?
SPEAKER_00:Anxiety has the sneaky way of making you feel like you always have to be on. Even when you're supposed to relax, your brain is like, should I be doing laundry instead? Did I sign that permission slip? Wait, did I defrost the chicken?
SPEAKER_01:Exactly. You can be physically at brunch with friends, but mentally running through your to-do list like you're being chased by the FBI. Fun turns into another task. Okay, am I having fun now? Am I doing it right? Is everyone here with us having fun right now?
SPEAKER_00:Like oh Lord, it never ends. Right. And that's the thing. Anxiety convinces us that being joyful is irresponsible. Like if we're laughing, we're letting something fall apart somewhere else.
SPEAKER_01:Okay, real talk. When is the last time you did something just for you? Not for your kids, not for your husband, not for your job, just for the pure joy of it.
SPEAKER_00:Most moms can't even answer that because I know I can't. Because honestly, I don't do enough for myself. Um because we tie our worthy to productivity, I think. If I'm not getting something done, I'm wasting time. But joy isn't wasted time, it's uh maintenance for your soul. It is. So how can we be better? We need to be better at this. Well, I can tell you one thing. I um doing this podcast, I did for myself. Yes. I did. It was one thing I did for myself. This is my time to do something that has nothing to do with the fact that I have to take care of my children, something with them, or I have to take care of my grandchildren for something, or I have to take care of my husband for something, and something that is for me that I hope to help learn more for myself through the whole time. So it's as much as I want to bring good things to other people, it's also like, you know, which brings joy and happiness, right? And then in turn that does some good things for me, positive thing for me.
SPEAKER_01:I will say the same. I the hobbies is see hobbies I think of are like, are we gonna knit some shit?
SPEAKER_00:Or like we could. You want to start? No.
SPEAKER_01:I need hobbies. Okay, so when I when I can't sing, so that's not a hobby.
SPEAKER_00:Can't play an instrument. Nope, that's gone too. So I don't really know what the hell my hobby would be.
SPEAKER_01:But when I was going through hell in my perf professional career, right? And like I was kind of jolted. I was I was jolted, and I was like, okay, you know what? Now's my time for me. Like now's my time. And and then I sat there and I'm like, fuck, I don't, what do I, what do I, what do I enjoy doing? Like I don't have any hobbies or hardly any friends. And like, what am I gonna, what am I gonna do? What am I gonna spend my time on? Like when I stopped des, you know, when I stopped designating or when everything wasn't career focused for me anymore, it was just this big question mark, like, what do I do for fun? And I don't know, like I love going to top golf, but I don't golf. You know, men go to the golf course or men go fishing, which I also like to go fishing, but I'm not gonna pick up a fucking tackle box and go fishing by myself. I don't like to touch the worms or the fish. Like me either.
SPEAKER_00:I could do fishing, I could do that, but somebody would have to put my shit together and then I'll just cast a line. That I can do. But like again, and then you can put on the some good music, and I'll even put it on my ears so that that way it's not disturbing the fish from biting or whatever.
SPEAKER_01:You don't like shopping, but like I could spend my life like I thoroughly enjoy Ross, Marshall's TJ Maxx. But also when you're trying to watch what you spend, like it's not funny.
SPEAKER_00:That's not fun to go shopping because you can't you don't want to spend any money. Right. So And when I go shopping, I end up shopping for somebody else because I just get on I hate shopping for myself. And then then I just sit and think, really, do I need to buy that for that person? I don't know. I don't like I seriously. This is the one thing that I do think is that when women have children and we do tend to absorb ourselves in their lives and do all these things, make sure that they have the most joyful, happy childhood. That's what you want, right? And then it comes time that your kids are older, and then you say, Well, so what makes me joyful and happy? And then it's like a job trying to figure out what the hell that is. I don't know. Like, I don't know.
SPEAKER_01:And I know um our episode next week will be on blended families, and we can kind of talk about and and not just blended families, but also I feel like we can kind of dive into relationships with your kids post-divorce, maybe, because this last couple of vacations that I've been on, you know, in the summer, I think the basic like parenting plan is that each parent can have up up to two weeks of like vacation time with their kids. But like my ex-husband takes the kids on vacation like super early in June. And I had just started a new job and like they, I we have unlimited PTO, so I could take whatever time I wanted, but like there is so it's new, like I said, post-divorce, but there's this new, I guess, anxiety about vacations and things that like am I are they gonna have as much fun on my vacation as they did on his vacation? And like they're little assholes too that like play into it because they're like, Well, my dad did this, or we did this with dad, or we're gonna do this. And so, like, there's always that everything, I guess, is just a comparison game.
SPEAKER_00:And I'm like, It's called competition that you don't need to enter.
SPEAKER_01:Oh God, I know. Competition you don't need to enter. I like that. I like that. But even I found myself on these last couple of vacations we took that I'm like, is everybody having fun? It's not just like, do I enjoy it? It's is everybody having fun? Like, why do you have that look on your face? You don't look like you're having fun. Are you having fun?
SPEAKER_00:Like, why aren't you having fun? What are we gonna do to see? I think that's my problem. I'm more worried about is everybody else having a good time? Is everybody else liking this? Is there did I put everything together right for them?
SPEAKER_01:So, how do we get to the place where we don't give a shit if they're having fun? Like, are you enjoying well, but again, I'm gonna go back to sometimes kids are assholes because if they're not having fun, they make sure you know about it and they're telling you that they're not having fun.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, I'm bored. I'm bored. I'm bored. Shut up.
SPEAKER_01:Yes. I know we'll just be chilling at home, and Norm will be like hanging upside down off a chair and she'll be like, I'm so born. Well, that's great for you, but I work 40 hours a week and I love being bored. I love sitting my ass here in this chair watching Chicago Med, which I am watching right now, currently, um, trying to get up to present day. But like, shut up. I don't know. Go run around the house, go read a book. She loves to read, but like, I don't care. I like being bored. It's a problem that I find joy in being bored. In being bored.
SPEAKER_00:That's my well, I kind of like that too. But you know, the thing about it is I think I try to figure out is like, okay, so I'm in that phase in my life of, you know, I'm still have a full-time job. I'm gonna have to work it for still a while longer, but like, what where's this gonna take me eventually? Like, where am I gonna be for being able to retire? And I don't want to be too, I don't want to work for longer than I have to. I would like to retire earlier on the earlier side of things and the later side of things. Okay, but then if I retired, like what do I want to do? And I can say I don't want to just sit there and do nothing and be bored. So, but what the hell am I gonna do to be?
SPEAKER_01:Well, you were making fun of knitting, but I think it sounds like an excellent idea. I think we need to start.
SPEAKER_00:I don't know. I mean, I I don't know. See, this is where it's I I think I've always had joy in taking care of things for a lot of other people, and I have when I was younger. I do think I'm hitting that point in my life where I really want to make the shift to turn into be more about making sure I'm having a good time and having fun.
SPEAKER_01:But we're so far lost we don't even know what that looks like anymore.
SPEAKER_00:That's kind of hard. But I will say one thing, like so. My husband and I, we we were even talking about because a lot of times, you know, when you go to go out and do something, you're always like, well, who are we gonna call to go with us? Let's call so-and-so, let's call so-and-so. Oh my god, they can't, they can't, and they can't, or something. Then you're like, what are we gonna do? I guess we'll just sit home and be bored, right? Watch the movies. And I told him, I said, we're done with doing that. We're gonna go do stuff together. I'm we're gonna turn in that couple that, like, you know, you just see snapshots of just the two of us doing stuff. And I'm like, I think that would be fun that we just do things just us, and not that we haven't done things before just us, but I'm but you know, I mean, it's like you raise kids, the kids are there, and then you might get lucky you have your date night or something or whatever. Okay, but that's not the same as like we're just gonna play in a more and more things that are constant of just like us. We don't have we just have the one left to like really be home more, but she's so busy, you know what I mean. So we went actually to a comedy club. We've got plans next Friday to go to another comedy club, and then we have we even booked another one for like January to go to watch a comedy. So I'm like, okay, we're gonna be obviously the comedy going people, I guess. And um, I don't really even find a whole lot of people really, really funny. So I'm hoping I find good people that are funny. So we'll see. Some of them are kind of like, oh yeah, okay, you know, that's good. But I will say that we went to the funny bone and they had a lemon martini. That is my drink. Delicious. I don't care if the comedy person sucks. That is a delicious drink of the funny bones. I will be drinking my lemon martini. They have a lemon bone. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:I had a friend, not a friend. She was just a friend for a season. Yeah. And she loved them. And she got me hooked on lemon drop. We'd get so fucked up so fast. Oh, yes. Like, I will never forget. Like, we went out for um what's the freaking Irish holiday?
unknown:St.
SPEAKER_01:Patrick's Day. Jesus. Like, what the hell? And we were fucked up within like an hour and a half. And I'm like, I've got to stop drinking lemon drops and blueberry lemon drops and strawberry lemon drops.
SPEAKER_00:I am a martini girl, but I have to have them be the flavored ones saying chocolate. And I the only one that I have not drinked, the only reason why I'm like, I don't know, I just feel like it's like asking me to have a heart attack is the one with espresso. You know what I mean? Like, get in a chocolate espresso. Martine, I'm like, so you want to like jack me up and give me alcohol always makes me kind of like, ooh, tired a little bit. It's like you have to get enough in me before it like gets me to where I'm like jacked up. First, I just go to, okay, now it's putting me to sleep. And then the next drink will put you to where you kind of like start to come up. But I'm like, I don't know. I have it's the only one I haven't had, but oh yeah. Good, sweet. But the lemon drops are by far my favorite. And I have had some that aren't good at places, but very good at this comedy club. So yes, I will be visiting there more just so I can have that drink.
SPEAKER_01:There you go. Just for just for a lemon drop. Yeah. When I when the season changed and I'm not friends with that person anymore, I, you know, I think I had some PTSD from lemon drops, but now that we're talking about it, I could, I could go for a lemon drop for sure.
SPEAKER_00:And the sugar on the top around the rim.
SPEAKER_01:She was a hell freak, so she would be like, no sugar. And I'm like, I'll tell you first you're not sure.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. I will lick the gum.
SPEAKER_01:That was Gina slurping, not me for the record. And that's why her and Tom keep it so hot.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, yeah, you gotta lick the rim.
SPEAKER_01:Oh god. Oh boy, I'm blushing. I just saw that they were linking autism to circumcision. For real. I saw that on Facebook. You can't read everything. Well, I don't know. I don't know if it was like a satire site, but it did say R RFK Jr. is linking, or says there's a link between autism and circumcision, and I didn't keep I didn't even keep reading and before that's real.
SPEAKER_00:Must be a satire site. I don't know. Say that might be a little bit full of shit. Yes. And off topic. Okay, anyways, let's get back to what we're supposed to be talking about.
SPEAKER_01:That does bring me joy. I was just getting ready to say TikTok brings me great joy.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, I was talking about something else.
SPEAKER_01:Yes, we know. But I was trying to stick to the topic of TikTok giving me joy, not blowjobs like that's.
SPEAKER_00:I was talking about licking the rim of my cup. I don't know where your head just went.
SPEAKER_01:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_00:Uh-huh. Um, but no, I think that's freaking great that you guys are. Yeah, I just figure, you know, like that's the thing is I do realize I have to figure out how to find my joy. One thing it always honestly is I do love being with my husband. Like, we have always been that way. Like, we're the weird couple who would rather just do everything and together. Like he always, like, we worked together for a portion of time, obviously, when we knew each other in the beginning. And he would always be like, I just want to work with you again. I want to have her, we have a job together again, you know, like go to work together and go to lunch together. We did it all all the time. Um, so I do know for sure doing things with him is always fun, but I do feel like we could easily get stuck with just like, well, what's the next thing that's streaming? And let's find the well, now we're kind of running out of some streaming stuff. So we need to get our butts out and do some things different than what we normally would have been doing. And I and if people come great, and if they don't, they don't.
SPEAKER_01:And I love that. And I will say, like, Brad and I have kind of gotten out of that habit. Um, and we definitely need to get back to it. But like when we first met, like we would pick up and we would go to Jamaica. We would pick up and I would fly to him and we would do, you know, a weekend in Florida here and a week, whatever. And like, we definitely need to, like, yes, he is one of my favorite people in the whole world, and I want to spend time with him. But I think too, I get nervous that I, after having kids, I've lost myself in the kids. And then, like, I also want to be my own person. And God forbid something happens to Tom or Brad or whatever. But like, I want to still have things that I enjoy on my own. And I don't want to get so caught up in that, like, God again, God forbid something happens that like I wouldn't know.
SPEAKER_00:Okay, so I'm gonna, I'm just gonna add something because you said that. Because you know, you have to with me going through the situation of thinking I really was going to lose my husband, I when I told him I told him it's there's portion of the time I'm a I'm a planner, uh control freak planner. So, like, even when he was there and I didn't know if he would make it, you know, I planned um his funeral in my head. I planned if he ended up in a facility in my head, and I planned if he got to come home. And so I I I did all that planning. Well, if he had passed away or even went into a facility where he really was, like what they talked about, I have to have a life of, I'm gonna have a life pretty much more um about me. What was I gonna do with it? You know what I mean? And a lot of people always say, you know, oh, you gotta have a relationship with your the person that you're with and whatever, but you gotta make sure that you're having all these other things going on, these other relationships are all of a sudden you're gonna feel very alone, like if something happened. But I think even like when we talk about like the seasons and people have like you have these group of friends, and um, just like on Sunday Confessions, when that girl said, like, all of a sudden these people, it's like, what the heck? Like they're going against her, right? Now you might have to go find a new group of friends. Well, I can at any time find my friends. Yeah, that's a good point. So, I mean, I know a lot of and I not saying that there people shouldn't spend time doing their own things, and if you have hobbies and you love to do all that, oh, that's great. Um, and do I think it's good to have something that you do enjoy to do by yourself? You know, maybe guys go have a pool night or you know, I yes, I think it's good to have things that you do with the, you know, people that have interests of your own, you know, girls' night, guys' night or something. But I don't really really spend time a lot of time worrying about that so much because I just look at it as I really only have that this person, this man in my life for who knows how many years. And if we get to grow old and be 95 and you know, that's when we pass away, great. If somebody passes away early, her him or me, then we could figure you can figure out your friends and your shit then. That's why people are here for a season and then you find a new group. I'll find my group then. I might be 80 and trying to find friends, but yeah. Might be a little tougher. I don't know. No, but then you go to retirement communities. And hey, they are very friendly in retirement communities. Let's be honest.
SPEAKER_01:Some of them I've seen, I don't I don't know. I watched some series where they were just as it was like middle school villages.
SPEAKER_00:Like middle school.
SPEAKER_01:Senior citizens.
SPEAKER_00:Well, I went when I went to the comedy club, the guy had even made a com joke about the villages in Florida and about how like his something about like his parents being there and all the STDs that go flying around and people are like swingers and stuff like that. So like I just laugh all the time. Believe me, there's plenty of stuff going on. And if you want to go to a if you want to go anywhere where there's a bunch of retired people, I will find my people at some point. And I'm not telling you I'm doing any of these things I just said. I'm just saying, I'm just saying that they have a lot of things that they do and whatever, but there's always these reasons, you know, there's these places you live and meet your people when you want to meet your people. There you go.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, everything for a season.
SPEAKER_00:Yep.
SPEAKER_01:For sure.
SPEAKER_00:So, how do we restart building that relationship with fun? Start small, don't overthink it. Ask yourself, what used to make me laugh until I snorted? Or what's something I always wanted to try but never did because mom life got in the way? Maybe it's a pottery class.
SPEAKER_01:Maybe it's no, no pottery, no pottery for Gina. Maybe it's karaoke. I freaking love singing karaoke.
SPEAKER_00:Oh my god, I forgot to sing. If I got up there, you guys everybody'd be like, seriously, get her off.
SPEAKER_01:That's I know, but okay.
SPEAKER_00:So Bradford, maybe get enough drinks with me and I'll do it, and I don't care what anybody says.
SPEAKER_01:But I'm boring. So Brad is sober, and so we literally just have had that conversation because one of the most favorite things we used to do is get drunk and sing karaoke. But like without the getting drunk, he's like, Well, we can sing still sing karaoke, and I'm like, I mean, I still need to get drunk.
SPEAKER_00:But if you okay, but if you still need to get drunk, but if you get used to it and you've done it, you don't have an excuse why you can't get up there drinking. Like, I'm not gonna get up there and not have some drinking. Yes, I have- I seriously sound like a dying cow if I'm drinking, so nobody really wants to hear me. But if I'm drunk, they're all gonna think it's funny and have a great time with me, so it won't matter. Until I get used to it.
SPEAKER_01:Then I guess I have a hard time taking an alcoholic to a bar. I don't know. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, that's if he doesn't care. He doesn't. Okay, then it doesn't matter. Yeah. I don't know. Maybe it's just dancing in the kitchen with a glass glass of wine after the kids go to bed. I don't know for that. Yeah, there you go. And if anxiety shows up whispering, you should be doing something more important, remind it, this is important.
SPEAKER_00:And honestly, you don't have to have a fun hobby that's Instagram worthy. If your weird mom hobby is collecting coffee mugs or watching crime documentaries, which I enjoy greatly, while folding laundry, own it, baby.
SPEAKER_01:I love crime. And that's another thing. Brad's like, I don't, how do you watch all of this shit? Like, so I can plan your murder, bro.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, yeah. I there's one called Snapped. It's almost always women.
SPEAKER_01:I love it. If you need help planning murder, welcome to the anxiety written mother stuff.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, yeah, I love that stuff. It's so good.
SPEAKER_01:I don't know. I find great joy in TV. I love TV, I love reality TV, I love documentaries, I love Netflix series, I love all TV. That that brings me joy. But I do too.
SPEAKER_00:That also creates the person that doesn't ever want to leave our house because which causes you ultimately social anxiety through time. So you can't do that. But I will say the one thing is I also thought is it should be, you know, it's what I think you even said about, you know, you have to you gotta be learning something new all the time and that you're always trying to find little things, right? And so um, if we're not out living and doing things, what are we doing? And so to me, I do feel like there's always something to learn all the time. I think for me, that's the thing. I think if I did a hobby, I it would have to be something that I felt like I'm learning to do something completely different, something new, just to work my brain, more than it's about like creating something beautiful to hang on my wall. Like that just doesn't do it for me. Like I really think there's some cool shit that I would love to do, like the um what's that uh not ceramics? Oh, what's the other thing? Come on, like it's a glossy, pretty you've already it's epoxy. There you go. Oh yeah. Have you seen like people do some cool shit with that? Like they'll make like a table and they'll do the epoxy top and stuff like that. Like, I love all that stuff, and there's even people make some other different, really neat things. I've seen a ton of stuff and thought maybe I should get into that. And then I say, No, I'm not going to, because it's just like, yes, it'll be something different that I can learn, but then I'm just gonna have a bunch of shit around my house I don't need.
SPEAKER_01:That's true.
SPEAKER_00:So that's why I don't want to do that.
SPEAKER_01:It's okay because right now we don't have any time for any hobbies. Our hobby is this podcast, yes, which is also kind of like a job, yes, and that it takes a lot of time, which is fine because we're really Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:This is that's a but that's the thing is I think that is one thing I can say with this. I enjoy because I've learning things, which is what I for me, I guess I I guess it's like when somebody says, What's your hobby? It doesn't sound cool that when you say your hobby is something that you like, you're just learning about something. But I really like learning. If I was gonna say anything's a hobby, it has to be learning. So this for me is I wouldn't say it's a hobby either. I don't know. See, I can I don't know. See how I'm at with this. Maybe not a hobby. Like when people say I have a hobby, I feel like you s you sing, you dance, you make shit, that's a hobby. You know, maybe you like restore a car if you're a guy, you know what I mean? Well, and women do too, but like you know what I'm saying, like I I don't do those things.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. So you just say you have none, and I'll say shopping, but then for fun, this podcast is a form of fun. Yeah. Sometimes we laugh a lot. I mean, I like it. I mean, there's a lot of laughter in it.
SPEAKER_00:I like to do something to make me laugh if you haven't noticed. Yes. We do laugh. I like the laugh.
SPEAKER_01:And we're learning. I mean, even just the the technical piece and even the piece of like the little clips and the different things, like you guys have no idea. Um there's a lot to learn. Yeah, the time. I mean, there's a ton of time that goes into the behind the scenes crap, just prepping the content and then setting up time to record, and then you record, and then you gotta keep all of you people engaged on on social media, which is like the hardest part of of all of this.
SPEAKER_00:Um especially when you have to we have to work and do all other stuff and take care of our jobs, and then this is like that hobby life in a way, I guess you would say, but I don't know. I just I I think that we hesitate calling it a hobby because we want to make money. So that's well, and we want to be I want to be bigger and reach more people and talk to more people and I don't know. So much.
SPEAKER_01:Everything that I everything that you know that it gets hard before it gets easy. You know what I mean? Like and so I think that we're in the hard, the thick of it right now. But the the moral of the story is that this podcast has helped me. I hope that it helps people, but it's also helped me step outside of my comfort zone. It's also given us something to enjoy out, you know, outside of of work and we're learning and we're growing, and that's that's a whole piece in itself. So Right. Right. We're just finding the joy and the small things and just what makes us happy and and defining who we are outside of our kids. And hell, I get I am having a good time embarrassing my kids too. They're like, oh, is this the anxiety-ridden mom's fun? Is this about the anxiety-ridden mom's? Yes, it is. And do you know that we are our sites and our social medias are visited most of the time by my daughter's little friends, so they are intrigued by what we are doing here. I'm just saying. They might be making fun of us, but yes. I don't care. Any attention is good attention at this point. And I'm sure there are people that listen to us. Like we listen to some podcasts and we're like, oh, not for me. Yeah. I'm sure there are plenty of people that listen and they're like, not for me. And that is okay.
SPEAKER_00:You can at the end of the day, all I care about is I'm having fun. So if you don't like it, that's fine. Because I'm at least enjoying myself. And I guess it goes along with your karaoke crap. I shouldn't care. I should go get up there, sing like a dying cow, and have fun, and not care that anybody says, dear God, where's the earplugs? Yes. You know what?
SPEAKER_01:I'm actually the opposite, is when I and when I get drunk, I get compliments on how well I sing. And I'm like, really, I thought I sounded like a dying rat. But I think all it is is when I get drunk, I have more confidence. So you sing really more. I go and I belt out and we'll be singing. Yeah. Yeah.
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Mindy McCready.
SPEAKER_00:I love to sing some karaoke to her. Um maybe that's the next thing. I gotta make my husband good. I'm gonna tell him we're gonna go sing some karaoke.
SPEAKER_01:Find us a karaoke, Brad and I will meet you. Find us some good karaoke. Um, I'm hesitant. I have some some people that were just in my life for a season that are big, avid comedy people. So I avoid comedy just because if I run into any of them in the near future, it will yeah, I might end up in jail. So like I don't I don't need that in my life. Um, but yeah, some karaoke. I do love some top golf.
SPEAKER_00:I suck at top golf. But I mean, here's the thing. I get here, wait, I suck at golf. Top golf, I usually am like always about in the middle of the pack for scoring. So I mean, that's a kind of a nice thing. But I swear to God, like my body doesn't turn. I need some serious stretching classes. Some yoga. I need maybe you could find some yoga. That's not fun though. Or joy or joyful. I know I couldn't say that. I have done, I have done it. Actually, um, there were some years back that I made Tom once a week. We would do this one yoga thing, but it was like a it was like a I don't know, it wasn't so yoga-y. It had better music. It wasn't like that, you know, you know music. Oh, hell no. No, because my niece goes and does that, and my um sister-in-law was telling me that like she gets all scratched up from these little goats. What? I guess they come running around or whatever. Dude, I will kick your goat. Whoops, I'm in downward dog, and oops, I missed your right leg.
SPEAKER_01:We're gonna put that on a t-shirt. Some people like hot yoga, some people just want to kick the goat.
SPEAKER_02:I don't know.
SPEAKER_00:But we did the honesty guy, though, we I was started the yoga thing, and I liked it better because it was more of a workout yoga thing, and it so it wasn't as quite of that same type of music. So it helped me to be able to get into it. Um, it was very good for me. And then Tom actually one day was like, I said, Why don't you do this with me? I go, you really need it. And he's like, Oh my god, it's not even a workout, that's just such a waste. And literally he was like, Okay, I'll do it with you. In 10 minutes, there was sweat dripping off of his nose. And I go, Well, I thought this wasn't really much of a workout. But it really is good. And yes, I should do that, but that's not joyful and fun. Okay, what's that's needed? What's joyful and fun?
SPEAKER_01:One where they're like hanging from the ceiling, like not like pole dancing, but like the oh, you mean that like bungee cord thingy?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, that looks funny to me. No, this is the shit that happens when you get old. One, I'll probably pee my pants because trampolines, you know, up and down, up and down, piss, piss, no. And then the other one is the other thing about it is my equilibrium's not the same. I think if it started floating, I can't swing on a swing set anymore.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Age ruins so many fun things. Yeah, I cannot, my equilibrium's jacked. I can't, I cannot. But it does look cool. If I was younger, I would have done it in a heartbeat because it looks like fun. At least I'm gonna do it. I've done other like, you know, Zumba classes when that was real big. So the moral of the story is depending on your instructor, it was fun.
SPEAKER_01:Getting old is the real joysucker because like I loved theme parks.
SPEAKER_00:Theme parks, oh yeah, I couldn't do them anymore. Roller coasters, the whole night I did too.
SPEAKER_01:The last time we were at Disney and I rode Tower of Terror, I thought I was going to die of a heart attack. Like every time that fucker dropped to the ground, I was like, I'm dying inside. Like, I'm literally dying inside. And then there were a couple of times, like, we got off the roller coaster. I'm like, I can't walk straight. Like getting old sucks.
SPEAKER_00:I'm not even that old, but like But it starts, but it starts around your age. That's about the age I was when it started, where I was like, why can't I do that anymore? Why is that so hard? I one time I like I even was in my pool and I did a somersault, you know, like a kid. I thought, you know, I haven't done this in forever. I'm gonna be, I'll go ahead and do it. Oh my god, I came when I came up, the my entire world was spinning. Yeah, I was like, oh my god, where's the edge of the pool? It was so bad. Like, this sucks. I just sometimes still want to be a kid. That was what brings me fun and joy. To act like a kid. That's what I admire about children is that they can act like idiots. We all get to laugh. It's all funny and cute. I just want to have those moments. They can also like call someone a motherfucker and it's funny and cute.
SPEAKER_01:But like I do it. It's all like serious feelings. Like, why are you such an asshole? Like, whatever. Whatever. Yeah. Damn. So getting old. Because I will say, like, I really enjoyed like Six Flags. Like, there were a time when I had a manager. Well, I had an office in St. Louis and I had an office in um Washington, Missouri. So Six Flags is kind of in between. And so one afternoon, I'm like, like, we had had a shit week and like it was terrible. And it was like a Friday afternoon. And I'm like, we're going to we're going to Six Flags. And then I couldn't walk when I got off these freaking roller coasters. And I was like, this was a fucking terrible idea. Like, what is happening?
SPEAKER_00:Well, have you tried to ride a bike?
SPEAKER_01:Oh my God, your butt and cratcha hurt for weeks. I feel like I ruined my knees playing volleyball back in high school. So like I can't even like kneeling at church, like makes my knee cap like makes my knees. And so like riding a bike has never been fun for me.
SPEAKER_00:Like, not since I mean that's I used to ride a bike all the time. I mean, all the time, long distances all the time. And I loved it. But oh my God, I remember getting on a bike just for like an exercise class. And I'm like, okay, I can't walk. Like this is ridiculous. I would need one of those like double-wide seats. Like yes. Cause I had a because I there's I especially um probably about 15 years ago or something, especially when I'd go out, I swear I'd see all these women. They'd get in the elevator with me because I'd go the because I sell and I'm out in hospitals and everything with the elevator. So I'd walk in and there'd always be these women and they'd have like these great legs. I mean, like just nicely shaped, beautiful legs. And I'd always be like, Man, you've got great legs. You gotta run or do something. Every one of them, I swear to God, you're either a runner, but a big portion of them, I take spin class, those spin classes. So I thought one day, I'm gonna do it. This one girl was like, I swear by it. And she was in great shape. She's like, all the time go to a spin class. Yeah, no. I didn't know.
SPEAKER_01:My butt hurts so bad. I did one spin class one time, and I wanted to fucking die. Like, it's crazy hard. Crazy hard. Not for me. And that's why I just do an exercise bike though, like for a little bit, but I can't do spin class. Like, I my heart felt like it was going to be hard. It's hard.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Explode.
SPEAKER_00:And those bikes are different. Like, there's a comfy bike bike that I can get on at the gym, and then there's a not comfy bike.
SPEAKER_01:I like the ones at the gym where you're like sitting back and I'm watching TV. And I'm like, like, I can do that for a long time. But like, no, a spin bike.
SPEAKER_00:I no, it's not for me.
unknown:Definitely.
SPEAKER_01:And people find joy going to the gym. I do. I am starting to really enjoy um our walks. Like, yeah, you know.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. Um exercising, the the one thing about it is I think is a lot of people when they first get started, you get tired. Like it kind of wears you out. But then after a couple weeks, then you get that energy that gives you more energy than what you had before. And I think that the more you do it, the more you that it is. We're like, man, I just I just feel better and I enjoy doing it. So I definitely like going to the gym. I am better, happier, sleep better.
SPEAKER_01:I was gonna say that's we we differ there though, because like I um we get up 6 30, 6 45, like we're walking 6 45. And um, you know, Friday we didn't, there was no school, and um, my mom had a a litter of kids, and we didn't, and it it was probably like 11 before my brain got going and my body got going, and I knew what the hell was happening because I I just I'm so used to starting at 6 30, 6 45, and like that's how my day starts. Yeah. And so when I changed it up that one day, I literally wanted to lay around and be a freaking, you know, sloth all day because I wasn't, I I just didn't get up and get get moving. Um, so that's that's interesting too, because it's just something to like jumpstart and like get me going and ready to go for the day. Um, but I also love when we skip sometimes. So like I'm not I don't know. It brings me joy sometimes. Sometimes it makes me want to hurt myself. It brings my dog joy um so much so that Freddy, when we skipped, she literally like sat by the back door, and like once she like literally brought me my tennis shoe. And I'm like, Yeah, we're not going today, girl. And she was sad, so like a lot of my motivation is by how happy it makes her because we have to sniff the same pee like every single day, whatever. But yeah, my my animals bring me joy.
SPEAKER_00:It's very good, especially if you're taking the dog ain't when it usually makes dogs happy to go for their walks. They're so very much happy.
SPEAKER_01:So I don't know, everybody just needs to find find something, and that's my challenge to everyone is to to find something or do something this week just for you, whether that's a massage, a pedicure, a walk, um what even if it's only for 10 minutes, there has to just be something that you do. Yes, that's just for you. Do something for you this week, just for you. It's about no one else. And report back. We want to know. Yeah, we want to know what you do.
SPEAKER_00:Definitely. If anxiety is the voice that says you don't have time for fun, then joy is the voice that says you don't have time not to.
SPEAKER_01:Fun isn't a luxury, it's part of healing. It's how we show our kids that life isn't just about surviving, it's about living.
SPEAKER_00:So this week your challenge is simple. Do one small thing that brings you joy, no guilt, no productivity attached, just joy, just like we said, even if it's only for 10 minutes. Even if it's a weird hobby. Right.
SPEAKER_01:A laughing moment. Whatever it is, joy deserves a seat at the table, too.
SPEAKER_00:If today's episode made you laugh or cry or realize you haven't had fun in a while, you're not alone.
SPEAKER_01:Make sure to follow the Anxiety Written Moms Club wherever you get your podcasts and on social media at the ARMC.
SPEAKER_00:Because anxious moms deserve joy too. If no one's told you lately, let me be the one to say it. You're not failing, you're growing, you're not broken, you're becoming, and you're doing better than you think.
SPEAKER_01:Thanks for being here today. If this episode resonated with you, I'd love if you'd subscribe, leave a review, or share it with another mom who might need to hear this. You can also connect with us on Facebook or TikTok at the ARMC. We'd love to hear your story.
SPEAKER_00:Until next time, give yourself grace, breathe deep, and remember, peace is possible.