Wine, Weed, And Why We Cope

The mind gets loud, the day gets heavy, and the easy fix starts to look like the only fix. We open up about the real reasons moms reach for alcohol, THC, and nicotine to quiet anxiety—then unpack why those choices can boomerang into hangxiety, restless sleep, and rising worry the next day. With humor, candor, and a dash of science, we break down how these substances work in your body, where they can help, and where they quietly take more than they give.

We share personal stories from work stress sprints and karaoke nights gone sideways to hard-won lessons about tolerance, blackout lines, and the slippery shift from social to solo use. Then we get practical. You’ll hear the clearest explainer on alcohol’s rebound effect, THC’s dose-and-strain differences (hello indica vs sativa), and why edibles are so easy to overdo. We also dive into nicotine’s biggest trap—temporary relief that actually raises baseline anxiety—and how habit loops keep vapes and cigarettes glued to your daily routine.

Most importantly, we offer fast, effective alternatives that don’t wreck your sleep or your next day. Think 30-second cold-face resets, humming and long exhales to nudge the vagus nerve, tiny directed tasks that anchor a racing mind, and low-calorie ritual swaps that preserve the wind-down without the hangover. If you’re sober-curious, cutting back, or just want a smarter toolkit for anxious moments, this conversation is a map: compassionate, honest, and zero shame.

Your anxiety wants quick relief. Your future self wants long-term peace. Press play to learn how to honor both—and if this landed with you, subscribe, share it with a friend, and leave a quick review so more moms can find the village.

Transcript

Welcome And Topic Setup

SPEAKER_00 0:01

You're listening to the Anxiety Ridden Moms Club, Season 2. I'm Kylie. And I'm Gina. Real moms, real anxiety, real conversations. Let's dive in because chaos is our cardio.

Why Moms Reach For Substances

SPEAKER_02 0:18

Welcome back to the Anxiety Ridden Moms Club, the place where we talk about anxiety, motherhood, and all the little coping mechanisms we allegedly use to survive.

SPEAKER_00 0:27

Allegedly. And today we're revisiting a topic that hit home for a lot of you: our relationship with substances, alcohol, THC, gummies, nicotine, basically everything moms joke about on TikTok, but secretly Google at 2 a.m.

SPEAKER_02 0:41

And before anyone clutches their pearls, this is not a shame episode. This is a real talk episode. Lighthearted, honest, sprinkle of humor, dash of science, so we can pretend we researched.

SPEAKER_00 0:53

Let's be real. Moms are out here trying to quiet the brain gremlins, overwhelm, intrusive thoughts, sensory overload. It's a lot.

SPEAKER_02 1:04

Substances are easy, fast, and socially normalized. Mommy needs wine culture. Didn't come from nowhere.

SPEAKER_00 1:11

Fun stat. Around one in five adults use substances specifically to cope with stress or anxiety. So if that's you, you're not alone. You're human. One in five.

Work Stress And The Alcohol Pull

SPEAKER_02 1:24

That doesn't seem I mean, that means four out of five don't. Right, it's pretty good. I think those are yeah. Huh. Scratch this episode. We don't even need to do it. I don't know. One in five. I don't know where you got that number from. I don't know if I believe it. The world's chaotic. Kids are screaming, laundry multiplying, work, emails dinging. Your brain says, you know what would help? A drink. And we're here to say we get it. We do. We do. Now my last job made me want to drink all the time. And I did drink all the time. And I smoked pot heavily, heavily. I've been in my new role since April. And it wasn't until giving season I'm in the full enthropy space for a financial tech company we know. And the Tuesday after Thanksgiving is Giving Tuesday. And we have there are four of us on our team. And we work together. It's great teamwork. Like everything is great. One of them left us. And so she left us the week before Thanksgiving, I think. So there we're we're down a man. And then it was Giving Tuesday. And then you know, coming off of Thanksgiving break, it was the longest week of my life. And I will say, since I've started this job in April, it was the first time I was like, Mama needs a whole bottle of fireball, not one fireball. And I I felt like I was finally getting a grasp on, you know, my my part of what I'm doing. And like it's fun because I'm like, oh my God, this is a whole new thing. I'm learning it. I'm killing it. Like, all great. And then now since this girl left, I'm also trying to learn like some of the things she did. So like that was overwhelming to me. And it was just so the first time since April, I was like, bring where's the fireball baby? Because I just I wanted a break. I wanted a break.

SPEAKER_00 3:42

A mental shutdown.

SPEAKER_02 3:43

I wanted something to just turn my mind off.

SPEAKER_00 3:48

Mm-hmm. Well, and I think alcohol is like the OG substance. Don't you think? I mean, I think it's the main go-to is alcohol.

SPEAKER_02 3:58

Used to be.

SPEAKER_00 3:59

Well, true. But I think that it still starts there. So even if like, okay, so like now we have, you know, everybody's into the gummies and you know and and having marijuana in one form or another. But I just think that always alcohol has been the first typical start go-to that people go, you know what I mean? Whether it's even just simply like the mom who has to have like a glass of wine, you know, at least several nights a week just to relax and, you know, chill or you know what I mean? Like I just think that alcohol is a definitely quick go-to.

Alcohol’s Calm Then Rebound Anxiety

SPEAKER_02 4:36

I think marijuana is jumping drastically now, but I was gonna say, I and and maybe we need to cover maybe we need to talk about alcohol specifically first and then kind of um loop back in the gummies and the TH THC because I do have some questions as you being an elder, my elder. Oh Lord, don't call me your elder. No, no, no, no, no. We're I'm I know I'm kidding. I did it to annoy you. But um I do, I don't know, I feel like there are some people in your generation and older that still think like the THC, like the taboo, like my dad, for example, wanted to punch me in the face when we were in Colorado before it was legal in Illinois and Missouri and Illinois. And um I was like, we gotta go to a dispensary, we gotta go to a dispensary, and like I was on his ever-loving nerve because he just doesn't get it, and it's still a drug to him, and it's not. And so I wanna, I wanna we I wanna dive into that, but first I want to touch on alcohol. Okay. Um, because I think you're right. I think it is the OG substance for people your age. Um this bitch says something about my age again. Oh man. Um alcohol can temporarily calm anxiety, but it actually increases anxiety within 12 to 24 hours, which is why that hangs out a literal psychological term now.

SPEAKER_00 6:04

Right. Right. It's like borrowing calm from tomorrow, paying it back in interest. I feel like that was Xanax too.

SPEAKER_02 6:12

Like if I take a Xanax, like it it does, it calms me down like in the moment, but then the next day it comes back like twice as bad. It's uh yeah, it's like the rebound anxiety. And so I don't, I don't use Xanax at all because I can't deal with the way it makes me feel.

SPEAKER_00 6:30

Um and see, I haven't, I mean, honestly, for a long time, I I mean, I think everybody has at least some form of anxiety. I don't, I don't even care who you are. I think it always has some sort of creeping up on you. But I really was more of the type of person where typically I would have um that happen. Like it's just been a couple months worth of like one thing after the other, after the other, after the other. And then that's when I would be like, okay, seriously, like I need some good drinks. I need a weekend, I need a night off. And we have some friends that are up the street, and that's when it would be like, come over, we're gonna have a fire, bring your alcohol. For sure. I mean, just to like blow off steam and get it over with. Because my anxiety by that point would just be the point, like it just needs to shut down for a little bit, and then I would move on and and get over it. Um, I think that menopause definitely has made anxiety increase some from what it used to be. And so I definitely can tell, you know, the difference of how you're like, um, I mean, you know, maybe glass of wine a little more often wouldn't wouldn't hurt anybody, you know. I'm not really a big I'm not really into um substitutes in general. If I did pick something, it definitely would be alcohol though.

SPEAKER_02 7:37

Well, I mean, there was a time to be happy and laughed more than I already knew. Yeah, there was a time, you know, prior to my divorce when we were still living together and like I was miserable and didn't want to come home. And one of my really, really good friends owned a pub um three minutes from work, and so it was super easy to go and have a drink, unwind, whatever. And uh, you know, several of us got in the habit of going up from work, bitching about work. So it was a good like release, and then I would come home and I would do the mom thing, and it it definitely became more um of a of a habit and an unhealthy one. Um, but since you know I know this personally because I've been on my own health journey now with the GLP GLP ones and exercise and rebuilding my relationship with myself and drinking less was a huge part of that. Also, you know, when I um stopped working, my corporate job, like I didn't feel the need to drink all the time. And it was never to the point where I was drinking every night or anything uh of that sort. Right. But it was definitely probably to an unhealthy point. And there were definitely nights where I got to an unhealthy level of how much I would consume because the more you drink, the more you can tolerate, the more you can tolerate the, you know, and then you just black out and get fucking ridiculous and you know, fall into the shit.

SPEAKER_00 9:08

But I've always been shit. I've always been a good cheat date.

Social Pressure And Drinking Culture

SPEAKER_02 9:11

Yeah, no, there, yeah, I could I could throw them back. Man, well, there was a group of us that used to party hard, and I was um two of us would joke like, it's time, it's time for the Red Bull, and the Tito's and Red Bull was my thing, and the Red Bull really did give you wings. And then one night I was sitting laying in bed and it was like three in the morning, and we had to get up for conferences the next day, and my heart was fucking palpitating out of my chest, and I was like, I gotta lay off the Red Bull. Like, I can't sleep. I can't sleep. Um but I do I and and for whatever reason, I guess I'm gonna throw out Charlie Kirk's name again too, but I do feel like the tides are kind of changing a little bit um where alcohol was was such a big thing. But I I guess I I want your thoughts on kind of alcohol. Why do we feel like we need alcohol to have fun? Why is when we're in a social setting, one of the first things we do uh drink alcohol? You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 10:17

Because I think at the end of the day, if you act like a fool, right? If you act silly, you do something that if you were sober, you know what I mean, you'd be humiliated over it. But at least if you're drunk, it gives everybody the excuse, but oh, let's say we're just drinking. So nobody cares. You know what I mean? So I think it gives you such a permission slip to laugh that much more, you know, be silly, do something that you dance like a fool.

SPEAKER_02 10:42

A permission slipper is like really calming your mind and your anxiety to let you let go or let you let loose. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 10:50

Yes. Well, that's why I think I think that's the thing. I think it's it's permission slip to do what you're wanting to it to do. So if I just want to take and I want to just chill out and relax, have a you know, glass or two, and that's it, then you're just gonna just kind of veg and enjoy, just being calm, calming my mind.

SPEAKER_02 11:05

Or do I want to act like an idiot and be silly and funny and you know, see, you're I can I can definitely, I'll I'll say you're definitely the have one or two just to calm down, calm your mind. I don't drink unless I'm getting fucking hammered. Like, unless it's like we're going out and we're getting fucked up and we're gonna sing karaoke and dance all night and do like I I don't drink. I do, you know, like I said, going through the divorce, I got into a habit of it. But like since I left that job, I I don't drink ever. Now, if you were like, hey, we're gonna go to Grafton and we're gonna get tore up from the floor up, fuck yeah, I'm in and I will drink all day and we'll have the time of our lives, right? But like I don't have that one or two glass of wine to calm down. That's just not good.

SPEAKER_00 11:53

So here's the thing, I can tell you like when I was younger, I really I mean, I liked it to get have a good time and have fun and be laugh and then just have a great night. But since I had gotten autoimmune, you're kind of kind of screwed me. So I that's so then you start realizing like and then you get older anyways, you get you get older and the more and more too that you think it, but like I really couldn't drink like that anymore. Because I could really drink before I had an autoimmune. So like it was just kind of one of those things where you could really tolerate it.

SPEAKER_02 12:21

You mean you could drink and drink and drink and drink and drink it.

SPEAKER_00 12:23

I could drink a lot, way too much for my own.

SPEAKER_02 12:25

So you don't know the puke and rally? No. You just you'd get fucking hammered and then you puke and then you keep getting hammered.

SPEAKER_00 12:32

No, no, no, no, no. But I wouldn't, I mean, ask a guy, like I'd be so I would never throw up till the next morning, anyways. Like, if I was gonna get sick. And I used to when I was young, McDonald's was my best friend. So like if you woke up after you've been drinking, you go straight to McDonald's, you get you a cheeseburger, a coke, and some fries. Totally fine.

SPEAKER_02 12:50

Yeah. And and you as you get older, like I don't want, I will feel like trash. I can't. I will feel like trash for a week afterwards, and it's not worth it. Like you work five days a week, you have two to get shit done. So if I'm going out and getting torn up from the floor up at any point in the I say them, I had an uncle say that one time and now it's just stuck. And so we say it all the time, like kind of making fun, but you know, yeah, we're getting torn up from the floor up. Then you don't fuck, I'm not fucking productive. Then I want to die and lay my ass on the couch or my head under a blanket because light hurts my head. Like it's just, it tears up my stomach, it tears up my head, it makes me dehydrated, and it takes me. I am, I think, 36 years old and like three-day hangover. And like, I don't have time for that. Not to mention I gotta go work on Monday and figure out what the fuck I'm trying to learn here.

SPEAKER_00 13:41

I don't want to throw away a day to be recouping. Now, there was one time that I got um tanked up, and my sister would we had to move her the next day, and I drank way too much with our friends. And I I had no intention. We were just hanging out at their house, and I just like we were just having a good time. And even and they even said they're like, You're a fun drunk, you're like, not that annoying drunk. So they just kept giving me more. You know, once you're drunk, you're just like, oh, sure, I'll have more, whatever, you know. And so we went to move, and the kids um were all there and they just saw I was sick. And since I have an autoimmune, they just assumed I was sick with my autoimmune. And I, of course, did not say anything. I just don't really feel good. And it was a hot day, and I mean hot, and you're hung over. Oh, it was horrible. That is the worst. And then finally, I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 14:30

The worst is sitting in a litter box meeting, leadership meeting, and being hung over, and being hung over and wanting to die, and you can't move your leg because you fell out of the Uber. And oh my god, yeah, that's terrible when you have to actually like do something the nice.

SPEAKER_00 14:52

I was I there's no way. I mean, I literally was saying there, but then all of a sudden Casey came up to me. He's like, So I actually felt sorry for you that you were sick, and now I just found out from Dan that you're just hung over. So I really don't care, and you need to get up and start doing some shit. And I'd be like, Oh, I'm gonna kill him for telling the kids. There you go. I needed to just sit for a little bit. It was too dang hot, but after a couple hours, I was fine. I just needed I needed my McDonald's and I didn't have it. We've gotten up and got moving too early, and I really needed my McDonald's because it truly does cure a hangover.

SPEAKER_02 15:18

There you go. Yeah, it does. Yeah, maybe.

SPEAKER_00 15:21

I I yeah, I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 15:22

I I'd like to think that I'm fun without alcohol, but you know, I've been asked if I'm drunk and I don't have any alcohol.

SPEAKER_00 15:29

And people be like, what is going on? Like, are you drunk or something? Because I'm having so much fun. And that's why I say I think it's it's a permission slip. If you're acting, silly, goofy, whatever, people like act like no big deal if you're drunk. But if you're not drunk, then they'll be like, there's something wrong with you. Like, why are you like, you know, like acting silly? You know what I mean? Are you drinking? Do you see alcohol around me? I just enjoy life and laughing. So it just is what it is. But and if I'm having fun, I mean, I should be able to have fun drinking or not.

SPEAKER_02 15:55

So part of me, so at this pub that my friend had, we would have karaoke nights. And like, I can't, in my head, in my life, like, I don't feel like I can sing, but I would get drunk and I would think I was fucking Shania Twain or whomever that I am Taylor Swift, like go hard. I can sing like a rock star, like I am one of the Dixie chicks, whatever. And like people would actually like compliment my singing, which would make me laugh because I'm like, okay, is it the confidence? Is that what the alcohol is giving me? Is the confidence, or is it the I don't give a fuck? Like the I can just go out and belt it where I'm not like, you know what I mean? It's just and so some of those nights were we're were the best or funnest nights because I would I would let loose. Now I am a fun drunk, and then there is a line. And if I cross it, then it's blackout puking. Like and so I have to know my, but for some reason, Tito's and Red Bull, like whatever. There were times I remember, remember when we had a conference at um Margaritaville in yeah, we went to bed at like 4 30 a.m. and we're like in the conference room at eight, like ready to go. Like ready to go. Yeah, there's a there's a line and you and you don't want to cross it.

SPEAKER_00 17:21

But since that job, like I don't I don't feel I don't feel the need to drink. Like I do think that definitely stressors from you know life in general general, but I think a lot of times people do get tied towards work, especially that it's like they need to come home and and wind down and you know, and alcohol is what a lot of people turn to. Like I said, I just I feel like there's um other things that people could focus their time on, and there's other things that we can all work towards to be not using that as a crutch instead, you know, use other things. But I just think that alcohol is easy. That's why people do it.

SPEAKER_02 17:58

So I mentioned Charlie Kirk because he he did not drink. Um Charlie did not drink, and there are videos that circulate that he says like the most intelligent people are the richest people in the world. He's like, look them up, like they don't consume alcohol. Yep. Um whether you like him or you don't, Donald Trump doesn't drink alcohol.

SPEAKER_00 18:22

Right. But there are a lot of the reasons I think that they can stay up as many hours as they can and and things like that. I mean, seriously, like alcohol, no matter what, even if you drink it, it's gonna take away your, you know, vitality or whatever.

Sober Curiosity And Ubiquity Of Alcohol

SPEAKER_02 18:37

And how quickly it can turn from socially to alone. How quickly it can turn from just having a drink socially to having a drink every night, from having a drink every night to relying on it. And it's just this vicious, vicious cycle. But also, I I can appreciate, um, and I'm cognizant of it because my boyfriend's sober, but like alcohol is everywhere. Again, I think the tides are turning because of recent events. I think that more people are being are sober. You hear California sober, which we'll get into that. Um, but more people are becoming sober. But but think about it. Weddings, you drink. People have problems if you don't, if you have a sober wedding. Um, and they probably won't stick around that long. Social events, you drink. We have a it's called the Harvest Fest that we have for our Catholic school, a fundraiser. There's a beer tent.

SPEAKER_00 19:32

There, as a world, as a whole, we have food and alcohol.

SPEAKER_02 19:37

We have food and alcohol and and we promote it and we make money off of it. Yep. Baseball games, hockey games, all of those things. I'm pretty sure you can drink at can you drink at the zoo? No. You can drink at the zoo. You can drink at Grant's farm. Like everywhere you go, there is an opportunity. And I can imagine as an alcoholic or someone sober, like that is hard. Every corner you turn, every single place you go, you're faced with the opportunity. Yes. It's right there in front of you. Um and it's hard. And and you just want I think you just want the voices to quiet and the anxiety, or you want to shut work down, or you want to sh you want to run away from your problems instead of face them head on. And alcohol just makes it that that much easier. You think.

Enter THC: Myths, Stories, Effects

SPEAKER_00 20:26

You think. You think that's the problem, I think, is that people feel like it's a great escape and they feel like it's gonna help them get through it when in reality they're not dealing with it. So those problems never get away. They actually usually become worse. And that's where the cycle and the problems I think become addiction and you just get stuck in this kind of rut. You know, I think it's just kind of how it is. Now let's talk THC. Edibles, gummies, vapes, the mom-approved alternatives. We accidentally eat the whole gummy instead of half, and suddenly you're just one with the couch.

SPEAKER_02 20:57

Let's talk about that. Oh my God. I have a story for that too. One time we were at one of these conferences, this leader leadership conferences, and we had to get on stage and we had to, well, only a select few of us. There were like 800 people there, and only like 10 of us had to get on stage and talk. And I was so anxious about it. And one of my girlfriends was like, Hey, I brought Xanax for the plane. Like, take half of it, you'll be fine. Cause like I overthink, I get nervous, I freak out, I don't know what to say, all of the things. Well, she forgot to bring me the Xanax, but she's like, I have a gummy. It'll calm you down. She forgot to tell me to take half. And so I get on the stage. One, I had cotton mouth like a mofo. So I pound like two bottles of water because I couldn't talk because I had cotton mouth. And I think at one point I called out the company that we worked for and was like, Well, we all know the equipment we have is shit. Like things I wouldn't have said just because I was really chilled out with gummies. But I also had gotten to a place. Anyway, it was the worst presentation that I've ever done in my entire life. And well, I thought when I watched the video, it wasn't that terrible, but it wasn't great. It wasn't my proudest moment anyway. Um, but I I love Mason THC. THC can chill you out. Um, it helps my anxiety, it calms my anxiety. Um, I feel like it almost sometimes makes me more productive. Like when I have to get stuff done, it can quiet my mind so then I can move on and do like the right thing. I love weed. I love to smoke it, I love to eat it, I love gummies, I love rice crispy.

SPEAKER_00 22:37

But like 20 to 30 percent of people report increased anxiety or paranoia with higher THC doses. So I think this is where, okay, like when you talked about the age difference in our opinions. Yes. Um I that's the thing is I think is that you as for we've seen people become paranoid and have all these different issues with uh THC. And yet they'd all promote to you and tell you that it's the best thing. It's gonna be turn our world, you know, we're gonna get gasoline from it and the whole day art. I friend he'd constantly researched on stuff to do with what you can do with this stuff to make our world a better place and how we should really be doing that, and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But he would sometimes drive me home. And when he would, I would have like he had this little tiny compartment on the top of his dashboard, and it was like you flipped. I don't even know the purpose for this thing, other than it was for his pipe. But he didn't work very hard. Very convenient. So I would a lot of times before I'd get out of his car, though, I'd flip that thing up and then I'd get out, and he'd just shake his head because he knew I was always like, Okay, dude, there's a point where there's like stop smoking the pot. I mean, like, I don't I don't care if people smoked it. I knew plenty of people who did. I mean, morning, noon, and night. That was like their life. And um, some of my friends that I knew that would do it, they would like laugh and laugh and laugh till it was like obnoxious laughing. And you'd be like, seriously, shit is not that damn funny. I don't care what the hell what in the hell you're taking, but they would be laughing so much. And then um, you know, the next group would just sit there and barely speak. And I would just be like, Who the hell wants to do that? Like, I understand sometimes, like when we talk about life and you get stressed out and whatever, and that maybe somebody's somebody's like, No, I just need a good like veg. You know what I mean? But I think that a lot of times it was like you always now we did have one guy, he smoked pot all the time, and he was our designated driver. I was gonna say, like, specifically, you don't know you know, hear of you don't typically hear of as many like accidents and different things because they tend to slow down. Not to say though that that doesn't mean that that's not a problem. And I can tell you that driving down the road all day long now when I'm out for work, I smell pot on a regular basis coming from a car next to me all the time.

SPEAKER_02 24:56

And it's just like walking around stores, especially in the winter, because smoke I feel like just thickens in the winter, like it just sits like you can almost like see it sitting in the air. And so, like I I when I was shopping the other day, I um yeah, everyone freaking reeked of weed.

SPEAKER_00 25:12

And yeah, and I mean it's and it's like just and that is where I mean I is I was, you know, young kid at the time. The kid that smoked pot took his time, he was chill, he didn't overly crazily smoke it. He smoked just enough. So he was way better of a choice to drive us around, obviously, than somebody's drinking alcohol. And he never got into a car accident, he never ran a stop sign, you know what I mean? He never did anything, he was never like going too slow. Like he drove what you're supposed to be doing, he paid attention, he was doing a good, he was driving well. Um, it was the best decision for sure. But he also like just he was a typical guy who smoked a lot of pot. What's up, man?

unknown 25:50

Hey, dude, right on.

SPEAKER_00 25:52

Yeah, what if it was like what did it become in life? Like, I feel like it's I don't know. Honestly, I don't know. Because he wasn't somebody who was, I mean, I was with him all the time, but just because he was like friends with most of my friends, and so like I got along with him well and and talked to him, obviously, and stuff like that, but he wasn't somebody that like I stayed in contact with, so I don't really know. Um and I do think a lot of the people that I've seen, some of the ones that were very much like that, that I was friends with, um a lot of them got it are in a band, have something to do with bands, you know what I mean? Like the typical, it's exactly the typical thing that you would think from back then you would do if you were somebody that consumed a lot of marijuana.

SPEAKER_02 26:33

And it's it's I guess for me is I don't understand I don't understand why it is taboo to so many people because especially now where we live, Illinois, Missouri, and uh, you know, a lot of the states, it's legal.

SPEAKER_00 26:48

It's legal. Okay, but it is legal, but does that mean we need to consume the amounts that now everybody consumes? I think that's where the problem's coming in. I think I don't care.

SPEAKER_02 26:55

Over consumption of anything, alcohol, weed, I I get it, but I still think there's this there's the this negative view of anyone that does pot or smokes pot.

SPEAKER_00 27:08

I'm the least probably judgmental about other people's lives, anyways, and I've never I I personally don't like care. I don't care what it is that people are like um doing, right? So like does it doesn't and I don't think there's anything wrong with it. I have friends that we hang out, and it's hilarious when they're on it, and I don't care, and I just don't even I don't like it because I hate cotton mouth. Like I cannot stand that. I don't know even and everybody I talk to, I was like, oh yeah, you're gonna get the cotton. I can't stand that. There's no way, I have no interest in that.

SPEAKER_02 27:35

I I mean, very rarely do I have it with gummies. Now, the gummies sometimes taste like grass and like for real.

SPEAKER_00 27:40

Yeah, and I that's right. I mean, there's I there's a lot of things about it where I just don't like it, but it's not it's at the same time. I understand why people are doing it, and yes, it is legal. I think that there's um some people have benefits from different things from it, there's reasons why they do it. And and I don't think there's anything wrong. I mean, it's instead you don't want to drink and you want to have a gummy or smoke a joint or uh do whatever you want. You know, and I don't care, but I also do think that no matter what, I feel like a lot of times that it's gotten to a point that people are over consuming it now, worse than it was even when I was a kid and they were consuming it. And I think that people think, well, it's medicinal, and you know, it's like a medicinal, but just like anything.

SPEAKER_02 28:20

The doctors will prescribe it and you can get your medical card for anxiety, but it does just make it worse. Or you get to the point where you have to smoke so much to make it helpful.

SPEAKER_00 28:28

It's still at the end of the day, is it still a drug? I want to get you high, so I'm not gonna lie.

SPEAKER_02 28:32

I'm sitting here thinking, like, oh my god, I want to get high with you because I think we would be so creative and it would be so funny and you would laugh fucking 50 times.

SPEAKER_00 28:40

I like when you if you're talking to me about something, I know that you are nowhere near as creative as you can do. So sometimes I'm like, you know, you want to smoke and join or something because you would really get the juices flow. Yes. And sometimes they don't come out of it.

Strains, Dosing, And Personal Fit

SPEAKER_02 28:52

Yes. For so for me, I can't I don't want to get a medical marijuana card because you can't um have a gun. You can't have a Foyd card, and I have I have a handgun because I bought a handgun because I had intentions on concealing and carrying, which now I know I will never I won't do because I don't trust myself. Not that I don't trust myself with a gun, like I'll shoot somebody, but I will shoot somebody accidentally because I'm not like I'm an idiot. So there's that. Um and I'm going to I'm gonna sell the gun, but I it's expensive. So if you don't have a medical card, it's it's freaking expensive. Um, but also it has a lot of negative impacts just on my skin, my hair. You know what I mean? Like it, what it does to my body. So as I'm trying to be healthier and live a healthier life, um, I've I've I've stopped smoking pot. But yes, there are times where I want to be creative and I want to have some fun and whatever. I am so intrigued by THC, though, because there are lots and lots and lots of different kinds and types and ways that they make you feel. Now, the way they tell you on the website it makes you feel is not always accurate. Um, because you can react differently. But like, for example, there's Indica or there's sativa and indica, they and to remember it, it's Indica Indicauch. And so if you smoke or eat or whatever, Indica, for most people, they're like, well, I don't, I don't like Indica because it makes me want to go to sleep. But for me, someone with high anxiety, when I smoke or eat Indica, it makes me a normal freaking human where I feel like I can live my life, you know what I mean? Like it quiets some of those fears and it quiets that anxiety to where I can I act like a normal human, not like I'm high strung and whatever.

SPEAKER_03 30:46

Right.

SPEAKER_02 30:47

Um, and then there's sativa, which makes my anxiety worse and it makes me more anxious and all so you've gotta you really gotta find like the type thing. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:59

And I've been told it before like if you ever want to get involved in anything, you have to kind of like learn trial and error.

SPEAKER_02 31:06

And how your body reacts because mine with indica normalizes. Everybody else, like if they're going out and want to party, they want to have a sativa. And that, no, I want indica because it's not gonna put me to sleep, it's just gonna make me normal. And then I do whatever. They give it to dogs, they give it to just to to calm the anxiety, but and for me personally, that's the thing.

SPEAKER_00 31:26

I I I feel like there's definitely purposes for it, and I defin and I see why for certain things people 100% want to use it. And I understand that some of the people who have gotten into where they they're they've learned it and they they enjoy it and they like it. And you know, I like I say, I it's everybody can do whatever they want. It doesn't bother me any. I don't care. And I've seen I've been with people and it's it's hilarious, or it's there's things about it that has been fun to be around those people doing those things, and I'm it's totally great. But I just don't I don't know. It's just not my thing. I think it never was my thing when I was a kid or anything. When I had when I was out with friends, like they even knew I could be sitting in a car and everybody be smoking the joint and they would know to pass it a past me. I d I don't like the smell of it. I don't like there's like nothing about it that was like intriguing to me. So I just and then I don't know if I've ever wanted to go through the whole headache, but I've never been like, you know, uppity in the manner of like absolutely not, nobody should ever do it. But I will say there are statistics coming out though, and I think it's due to the fact that people are overusing it, they're overutilizing it way too much, and it's causing uh it does affect your dopamine and that can become where it creates people to become more um have more issues and more problems. And then there's also some other new like syndrome or something that's creating, and people are waking up where they're nauseous, vomiting, and stuff like that, and it all is due from the fact that they have um used basically been using for too much and for too long, and so they have to um you know, but if they're not, if they stop using it, those things stop happening. So I mean there are like I think a lot of people, I think the problem that a lot of people have when they talk about all of a sudden it's legal and everybody's just like it's legal, so it's fine. Well, okay, alcohol is legal, but that doesn't mean you should sit around and drink constantly and consume and not think that it's not gonna harm you. It's all you know what I'm saying. Everything's gonna harm you at some point. There still has to be where you are intelligent, smart, and use your brain and don't let it take you over. If you do, I mean, anything can take you over. And so TC doesn't just become like, well, all of a sudden it's safe and it's no problem, and there's no well, there is though, you can become addicted to it and then you can have you become overusing. You know what I'm saying? I think that's where a lot of people probably in what you consider the older generation wouldn't say about it is like it's it's still legal or not. But I think too many people are taking it into how, well, it's legal so I can smoke and drive down the road, I can smoke and pulling over here, I can it's just like a ev it's all day long. They're consuming it, and that's when it's like, okay, well, hello, that's still a problem, just as if you drink alcohol all day long, that it's it's gonna cause you an issue. Exactly. I mean, it's it's anything in I mean, I'm I'm all for it so we must have fun. I don't it's whatever, you know. I totally get it. You're not a fun killer. No, I'm totally I'm not in fact of anything, you know. I uh my husband and I talk about because I mean we enjoy going out and watching the other people who are doing it because him and I just don't have desire really to be doing it. But it's like to watch the people doing it is hilarious. I mean, I have the greatest night ever. It's so fun. Love me some pot.

Overuse Risks And Dependence

SPEAKER_02 34:26

I I'm on a budget and I'm working on my skin. So, but yeah, no, I it does have negative effects, it does have its negative effects, and that's why I've completely backed off. Um I backed off a lot of things, and that's you know, if it for me, I just have the type I have a very addictive personality. I really do. So I can get addicted to anything. Um, and so it's really just kind of keeping that that in check. And for me, it's staying away from it because that's that's just the way, you know, that that's just the easiest way for me. But you know, it's also there's also nicotine. So oh yes.

SPEAKER_00 35:07

Oh yeah. I mean, those nicotine girlies, you know, we see you, the vape behind the shower curtain. I quit, but it's just still in my glove box, kind of like my friend with his little pipe sitting in the back. Yeah. And it's still always there waiting because you never know.

SPEAKER_02 35:22

And nicotine is a tricky one because people genuinely feel like nicotine calms them. But at the end of the day, nicotine increases your baseline anxiety over time. So you get relief from symptoms the nicotine itself is creating. And I I was a smoker, and that's where I just mentioned everything, whether it's weed, whether it's alcohol, both of those things made me want to smoke cigarettes. Well, yeah, smoking cigarettes is obviously very, very bad for you. Not to mention they're$12 a pack now. So, like for me, I have to abstain from all of it because I can't control, I can't control myself.

SPEAKER_00 35:58

So, and I smoked for a couple years, and it was when I was young. And um, you know, and I can say that like I understand why the people who continue to do it, but I think the biggest habit of it is the social aspect of when you're talking to somebody and you have something that you're doing. It's so like I think everybody says, Oh, it's all about the nicotine, and I'm 100% believe nicotine's addictive, blah, blah, blah. But at the same time, I think there's more to it with with a cigarette or vaping, because it also comes down to it's that habit of you're doing something. So if I was sitting with you and every time we talked and we smoked together, but not I'm gonna put it down and you're not or something. Like, that's that would be like weird. I wouldn't know what to do with my hands, or like it would just it just becomes a an additional habit of doing something, not even just like I'm Jones and for the nicotine. It's like more than that.

SPEAKER_02 36:42

Us here sitting talking about it right now, though, I would kill a motherfucker for a cigarette. Like, I'm not even kidding. Just talking about it makes me want a cigarette so bad. Yeah, I can hardly stand it.

SPEAKER_00 36:53

Yeah. Well, and see, I that's the thing is I I think it never, I don't know that it ever for a lot of people. Like, I'm gonna yell across the room, Brad. Can I have a cigarette?

SPEAKER_02 37:00

Because like I'm telling you, I what is wrong with me? Uh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:07

But I do think it's I mean, that's a whole big thing. And I think that people it's an appetite appetite suppressant too. That's why a lot of people don't want to give it up either. They feel like, you know, hey, it kind of keeps my weight in check.

SPEAKER_02 37:16

I just I just think have gained 30 pounds since I had quit. And lots of people I've known through the years that have has happened. I need something productive to do with my hands. Maybe I should knit.

SPEAKER_00 37:25

Get those fidgets.

SPEAKER_02 37:29

Oh my god. I need to knit. I need something. I'm gonna sit here with my fidget spinner. I want maybe if I knitted something and then at the end I had a nice scarf showar, or I had a nice penguin to give my daughter. I don't know. I need something to grandma's talk about.

SPEAKER_00 37:47

Okay, and the fidget spinners is you just act like you just spun a wheel. She has like just spinning a wheel, like ping, ping, ping, ping, ping. There is like I've played with them to where they are seriously addictive, which probably I mean everything you'll be addictive. It was seriously addictive, like the neat things we can do, the way you can flip it in your hands and spin it on your finger. And it's way more than just I'm just gonna sit and spin a wheel.

unknown 38:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:08

There's a lot of really cool ones out there and they're fun. And that's I mean, that's the thing to spin on the phone. I think if somebody wants to put something down, you have to find something else to because it's bigger than just nicotine. It has a lot to do with the habit of I'm doing something with my hands, and I've got to find what I can do to to replace that.

SPEAKER_02 38:25

Here's the root truth substances feel like a quick fix because they temporarily lower the volume of your anxiety.

SPEAKER_00 38:32

But long term, they usually make the anxiety worse, louder, and more unpredictable.

SPEAKER_02 38:38

And we're not anti-anything, we're pro-awareness, pro-asking. Is this helping long term or is it just numbing me short term?

SPEAKER_00 38:47

Okay, so let's talk about the alternatives that don't just wreck your sleep, your nervous system, or your next day mood. Quick, simple, mom-approved tools.

SPEAKER_02 38:57

Splash cold water on your face or put an ice pack under your eyes. It literally resets your nervous system. The 30-second cold face trick. Oh, that's kind of like a Nora does it all the time. Really? Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_00 39:12

Oh. Okay, so I've got one humming, singing, slow exhale breathing, all free, all legal, and all helpful. And I asked God, remember, I told you. Come on, here we go. I know what she's gonna say. Started my humming. I definitely do hum. The whole breathing doesn't do anything for me. Like there's so many people that tell me, oh my god, that breathing in so many seconds and out so many seconds like helps them so much. It really does not do anything for me. I swear to God, I will hyperventilate. But humming definitely like that, but the boring hum, not a hum, like a tune, like a that weird hum. Mm. Yeah, that is fucking weird. It's weird, but I'm not kidding you. The vibration I think in my body is what like calms me.

SPEAKER_02 39:56

Mom, we need to get outside and move our body. And pretend you're storming away dramatically. It works.

SPEAKER_00 40:06

Oh, you guys need to walk more for sure.

SPEAKER_02 40:09

That's why I was calling out my mom. We've got to start walking.

SPEAKER_00 40:12

Oh, man. It is like I've been telling you go in the mall or something.

SPEAKER_02 40:14

I said we're gonna get side-by-side treadmills. Yes, you need to do something. You gotta get back to the body. That doesn't help with my dogs, though. My aunt's like, just bundle up. It's fine. She goes every day. I know. I need to be more like her.

SPEAKER_00 40:25

Okay, swap rituals, not feelings. So if you love the ritual, if you love the ritual of a drink, mocktails, tea, sparkling water, fancy cups, trick your brain. See, I just don't want the calories.

SPEAKER_02 40:38

So whatever. Yeah, but there's a lot of those things we can do for low calorie. Give your brain a task. Anxiety hates direction. Clean one counter, fold five shirts, organize the junk drawer. Small wins equals calmer brain.

SPEAKER_00 40:51

Journaling, but like the lazy way. Set a two-minute timer and brain dump. Done.

SPEAKER_02 40:58

For sure. There are lots of ways we can calm our anxiety. And um we just want to be, we want to live and be our healthiest selves. And so figuring out how we do that in the self, the safest, healthiest way possible. I think that's that's the goal here. Yes, I totally agree. Totally. So whether you enjoy a drink, a gummy, or vape, you're not a bad mom or a bad person. You're just trying to quiet the chaos. With a disclaimer, I just keep seeing bad things about vaping. Don't vape people. You don't even know what it's doing. There is not enough research around it. There are, you know, you vape one time and it can give you lasting lung popcorn lung. Popcorn lung effects, and you need your lungs and dying and death because your lungs don't work like they're supposed to. Jen and I used to work in a um respiratory medical equipment.

SPEAKER_00 41:57

And I so you you go, you hear a lot of stories about these respiratory patients, and I know a lot of it unfortunately stems from smoking. And that comes to smoking is smoking. No matter what you're smoking, it's probably not the best thing to do.

SPEAKER_02 42:09

And I was thinking, yeah, pulmonary fibrosis, which is where you know your lungs are supposed to be elastic, they're supposed to be able to expand and contrast, and that's how they work. And we've encountered so many people with pulmonary fibrosis, and that's where your lungs harden and they don't expand and contrast, and you can't get out the CO2. And you just can you imagine dying and feeling like you are suffocating to death?

SPEAKER_00 42:36

And so here, you know what I used to do. So I would always time, I'd even tell the people in my branches, just so they could understand what it's like to live like these people. So um, any listeners can even try it. Take a straw and put it in your mouth. You can try a thicker straw and then go to a smaller straw. I was gonna say like a coffee stirring straw, you know, one of the very, very tiny ones. And just sit there for a few minutes, just breathe in and out and just through that straw. And uh, that's how much I mean it's exhausting. It's exhausting. And that's how it it it you know happens for these people. We're all doing bet the best we can, awareness over shame. And if you're working on cutting back or being more mindful, we're proud of you.

SPEAKER_02 43:14

We'll leave you with this. Your anxiety wants quick relief. Your future self wants long-term peace. Find the balance that honors both.

SPEAKER_00 43:23

We love you, we get you, and we're right here with you in the village. See you next week. If no one's told you lately, let me be the one to say it. You're not failing, you're growing, you're not broken, you're becoming, and you're doing better than you think.

SPEAKER_01 43:37

Thanks for being here today. If this episode resonated with you, I'd love if you'd subscribe, leave a review, or share it with another mom who might need to hear this. You can also connect with us on Facebook or TikTok at the ARMC. We'd love to hear your story. Until next time, give yourself grace, breathe deep, and remember peace is possible.